Posts tagged mom

My grandma’s wake was Wednesday and as soon as I saw her I broke down into an ugly crying mess. I had to go outside to find some sort of composure.  She looked beautiful in her blue dress. My grandpa tried to hold it together as best as he could but every so often, that tough old man couldn’t keep it in and he’d start to cry and that broke my heart even more. SO many people came. I’ve never seen prayer cards run out before but they did. She was very loved.

Thursday we went back to the funeral parlor and the immediate family said goodbye and went to the church for her Christian burial service.

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in the hospital is ridiculous. Luckily, my mom has been on vacation for the past week but she’s afraid to go back to work because she’s sure my grandma is going to starve there. I swear no one there has even looked at her chart because she cannot feed herself and they just drop off the food, they didn’t respond to the emergency call button at all when my mom pressed it today, they leave her on a bedpan for hours, when the nurses do come in to change the sheets or pad she’s on, they tell her to look at the door or the wall and get aggravated when she doesn’t but she can’t fucking see! I mean, she can but her brain is garbling everything so she thinks she can see things but she can’t process it. 

St. Joeseph’s hospital on Harlem Road in Cheektowaga. Such a terrible hospital. 

I just finished telling Eric about all of this and he was so mad he actually called down there to complain but he had to leave a message. My aunt and mom have been recording everything in a notebook, which I’m glad about but they shouldn’t have to!

I don’t mean to bring everyone down with this post but I’m so frustrated. She was put in intensive care right in front of the nurses station so someone would always be able to see her and it’s like she doesn’t exist. On top of that, it’s not like it’s a busy hospital. I bet she’s one of maybe five people on the floor. 

RRRG!

This time it’s to pick out his new furniture. He says he needs a “woman’s point of view” because obviously all women can decorate houses. He’s lucky I’m good at it. I’m thinking of going with a dusty green color… does that make sense? Dusty green? Anyway…

He wants to go out for lunch afterwards too but I don’t know if I feel like it. Even if I don’t I’m still going to end up going. It’s really hard to pick somewhere to eat when you’re not hungry though, ya know? 

Then we have to stop at my mom’s to wish her a happy birthday.

Today feels like a sitting at home and doing nothing kind of day and that’s all I feel like doing. 

And we’re too poor to get her anything and I’d love to (have to) make her something but you may recall how my family feels about home-made gifts… Ahhh! What am I going to make?? I’m running out of time!

i havent been sick in almost 3 years, and i just caught my daughters cold. i’m scared.